A Willingness to Forgive

Week 3: What is the biggest lesson in life you have found to be true?

One of the biggest lessons in life that I have found to be true is the fact that forgiveness is the true key to happiness. I think that a person can truly be defined by their ability to forgive; not just with people they are close to and care about, but also with people who we feel may not be deserving of our forgiveness.

In D&C 64:10, it says, "I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." To forgive is to show compassion - to see others through the eyes of Christ and to understand that we, as humans, are capable of making mistakes, but are also capable of feeling true remorse and experiencing the desire to change. Only the Lord truly knows what is in our hearts, and therefore, it is not our place to judge the actions of others. I believe it is our responsibility to forgive those who have wronged us whether or not they've asked for our forgiveness, and whether or not they even deserve it. The Lord did not command us to forgive those who are worthy of our forgiveness. Nor did he say to forgive only those who request it. He said we must forgive all men. And honestly, I think it was as much for our benefit as for the person's who is in need of our mercy.

Holding a grudge not only harbors pride and resentment, but it takes the space of love and understanding in your heart, without which relationships fester and die. My 12-year-old daughter and I had a conversation the other night, wherein she explained to me how sad she thought it was that so many people in the world allow an argument to destroy their relationship with a loved one, perhaps to the point that they go years without speaking. She said how she hoped that that would never happen to us. I assured her in that moment that it never would - that because of my unconditional love for her, there would always be forgiveness. I only pray that the conversation helped her to understand the value of my relationship with her, along with the importance of forgiveness in her own life. I am sorry, but no argument or misunderstanding is worth losing the ones you love.

Mark Twain said that "Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."  This has always been one of my favorite quotes. It is a beautiful expression, which exemplifies what an amazing, loving gift that forgiveness can be!

Related link:

52 Gems of Reflection